Update

Well, just a quick update.

I've left the LDS Church, but still keep in contact with my friends from the Church. I've left my shop job, and got a more...satisfying job, and it offers more hours and career prospects :D And I met someone! A little while after my last post, I met someone from my old Primary School. So in fact, I didn't "meet" him...just "re-met" him. Anyways...I met him whilst I was on a date with a friend, and in the evening, the friend and I were gonna go out with his friends, and I literally just insisted on this guy being invited...and I'm so glad I did! At the end of the night, I kissed him...I asked him out for the next evening...just to get to know each other a little better, (so...a date?) and the next day, he asked me to be his girlfriend! I don't know what prompted me to say yes, but it as the only word I wanted to say :D There was something about him...still is...that made him so attractive...He has this way of making me forget everything that's wrong, and just smiling and being happy with him. He makes everything seem lighter, better.

There's just one problem. He lives in another county. So we decided to fix that problem. I'm moving in with my grandparents...in that same county...In the same town!

We keep rowing over silly things...Like we'll go for weeks without a row...and then we'll just spend a week bickering with each other, and I hate it! I don't eat properly in that week, I don't sleep properly, I just don't feel right in myself...I don't do my job properly and I'm really distracted... and it's the worst week ever. And I said last time that I couldn't take it. I really can't deal with it much longer...but he means so much to me and I don't want to let him go... The happy times are worth the bad times...If you get me...

Missing a missionary

My best friend is so lucky. He's off on a mission in the Church. He's been gone about a month, and I still have the urge to call or text him every day. I've been writing to him, and everything, but it just isn't the same. I mean, I can't WRITE a letter to him to say "Let's go watch Mr Popper's Penguins, I'm bored. I'll pay" Doesn't work like that. And I can't exactly write to him and enthuse about how brilliant a film is, he'll not appreciate that.

I'm probably writing to him too frequently at the moment (once a week whilst he's at the MTC), but it's the only way I can communicate with him, and it's a way of keeping the connection, the friendship alive while he's gone.

But I'm scared. I'm scared he'll not write back (he hasn't so far, but I know he's busy. But a LOAD of people have heard from him). I'm scared he'll just forget me. He told me in May that he'd write to me every week. Nay, every DAY! And then like the day before he left, he messaged me saying "Actually, I'm not sure how frequently I'll be able to write you. It won't be that often, maybe once a quarter." Once a quarter. ONCE every 3 months?!?! Well, I feel like an old toy, just left in the corner. I seriously am not kidding, my heart starts pounding every time the mailman comes, and I can't pick up the post fast enough. And the disappointment - Well, I'm getting used to that now. Not ideal.

Him being so far away (he's at Provo at the moment, then in September, he's off to Berlin, Germany) is quite difficult. What can you do when the person who's the reason you're crying is also the only person who can stop the tears? I cried because I miss him, I miss his hugs, his smile, and his eyes. And I could never cry round him. Or be angry, or anything. I was just always happy. And if tears ever did threaten, all he had to do was talk to me, hug me, or anything like that and I'd immediately calm down. So, yeah, what do I do? I have so many memories of him, of us around my room, always reminding me of him, but I think it would very literally kill me to forget.

I'm eagerly looking forward to his return, because, well...Pretty self-explanatory, that one. But at the same time, I'm terrified. We'll both be different. Not just older, but more mature, and different personalities. What if we don't get along? What if my best friend is the guy that left, and I don't like the guy that comes back? Or he doesn't like me? Meep.

Er. In other news. Off to my Dad's tomorrow for a few days. Finished college, results are due soon. NOT looking forward to those. I'm also looking for a new job, and I'm in a predicament with a few friends from my old Church. See, they basically are giving me LOADS of Anti-LDS literature, which stings, and they hardly know anything about my Church. So I'm trying to educate them, but I reckon it's like telling someone the sky is pink. They won't budge on their opinion, which is a shame, because if they just opened their eyes a little, they'll see that the LDS are some of the nicest people in the World. And yeah, like every society, every culture, there are a few that give the majority a bad name. Because of some guy in the States very recently, my mother is convinced we practice polygamy. Started talking about it over dinner today. I very nearly choked on my stir-fry. But my mother and her partner are slowly becoming more open-minded to the Church, which is again, a shock. And I think I'm just gonna leave that annoying, and quite frankly DULL website known as Facebook... Nothing good happens on there anyway.

Until next time! <3

The end of what could be the most terrible week of 2011

Everything has gone wrong. No literally. Everything.

I had an exam on Monday, and I KNOW I failed that.

I went to Seminary/Mutual on Tuesday, and I just wasn't made to feel welcome by half the youth

I had a meal out on Thursday...and was totally ignored by the people I was with. They glared at me for ordering a dessert and a drink, they shut me out. They dropped me off home, cos they wanted to go out. I honestly don't know why I was invited.

I was at work last night and I randomly started bleeding and I had to rescue a child from Polish

...And to cap the worst darn week ever...Something fell off the top shelf at work and hit me square in the face.

And I'm in the library sat 2 seats down from 3 noisy-as chav girls.

Honestly, I've had just about enough.

There's a mix of good and bad

"Life is like a box of chocolates...you never know what you're gonna get."

Seriously, you don't always get that cute little pamphlet telling you what chocolate is what, and you sometimes get an orange creme, or a truffle.

My little orange creme has been interesting. My 'friends' have basically all just slated the Church, and didn't understand why I wasn't amused. I need better friends, or so it seems. I've also pulled my calf muscle, so that's a little painful.

I have however, had a few truffles. I've had a lesson with the missionaries this week, spoken to my Home Teacher, and started to write to a missionary. I've felt like I've been happier as well.

Hopefully, things will end up looking up by the rest of the week, but to be honest, I want it to be the weekend already! :)

God Bless!!

Ek!

EEEK! I have an exam today, and to say I'm nervous is an understatement! I am so not ready for it!

I'm sat in my school library (again) with my iPod, trying not to panic, and failing epically!!!!

On the brightside, I have a major sugar rush going on. Me and a friend went to the local shops in our free, and got cake, chocolate, crisps and a sandwich. What a good start to the diet, Donna.

My family have had chicken for dinner every night, and to be honest, I'm a little sick of it. So what kind of sarnie do I get from Tescos? Yup. Chicken Caeser.

We had a really valid point made during a talk at Church yesterday, and I've totally forgotten it, hopefully, I can edit this post, to include it, when I remember it.

Speaking of yesterday, I phoned one of my friends yesterday that I haven't spoken to for AGES! Seriously! And it was really odd, like I was sat on my bedroom floor, catching up on some Seminary, when I had the overwhelming urge to call this guy, so I phoned my Bishop, and asked for his number, and called him. He said he's gonna come to Ward Conference, and if he doesn't, I will in ALL honesty, just cry. This guy is amazing, he's stopped me doing some pretty stupid things, and he's always encouraged me to do the right thing, hopefully, I can do the same for him, and others.

Right, I'm off to revise Othello and speech features. This could be fatal. God Bless

I guess I don't have a title for this?

Well. Uhm. Where to start??

I had my drama exam yesterday, and quite simply...It was AWESOME! I will never describe an exam as such again. We had some music on after the show and were like dancing on stage to it, and we got the audience to join in! Was so cool. Although all the kids now keep shouting in the corridors "OHMYGOSH!! It's the Queen's son, thingy!!!!" to which I reply "Zanni". Sometimes, the roles just ain't worth the after-effects. How long am I to be remembered as an idiot with orange slicked-back hair, terrible make up, in a jester's suit, oggling Tinkerbell??

A lot longer now I've put it on the Internet.....

I read an article today, and it interested me, a lot. It's about how people view families. How often do you see families inside a pub, eeating lunch, in England? NEVER. Why? Children are banned in pubs. The only time they're allowed in the premises is in the beer garden. Which, if in adverse weather, or near smokers, is hardly ideal.

Shoppers do it. If a child starts crying, people tut, and roll their eyes, as though it's the mother's fault. Like she's provoking the child to misbehave. I've done it once or twice.

I've read about an elderly gentleman threatening to hit a 6 year old child with his walking stick because the lad wasn't "moving out of the way fast enough."

That's disgusting. We can't treat children like that. We need to face the facts that babies cry. Toddlers chuck tantrums, and children disobey. We can't blame the mother, it's just how children ARE.


Plus....I GOT A C ON A LAW PAPER!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unfortunately, I was 2% of a B. I could have cried. But I was so darn happy with my C.

As always, God Bless

It's funny...

..When it comes to my blog, I can write a lot, and think nothing of it, but when it comes to coursework and homework, I cannot think of a thing to write! D: Right now, I'm trying to do the commentary for a re-cast. I hate year 13 :) I mean, there's so much work, and every subject expects you to drop everything and do everything in their subject, but we have 3, and there's no possible way we can do that for everything!

STOP EXPECTING SO MUCH OF US BRITISH GOVERNMENT!

Plus, I have Seminary. And work. And it seems like it never ends, I don't feel like I have a break (Insert hysterically said face here). If uni's worse than this, I'm glad I'm not going. Could I do Open University? Could I motivate myself? Nope.

Went to the dentists yesterday. I have a cavity! Worse - I have a cavity each side of my mouth! AAAAH! So she's making me keep a "diet diary". Everything I eat or drink, I have to note down in that dumb notepad. Needless to say, I now carry a toothbrush and toothpaste with me - everywhere! I don't want a filling - It involves needles, and I intensely dislike those. I mean, I know it's better in the long run, but eeeeeeek!


Also, the ONE person on this Earth, who I thought would not ignore me, is. Ouch.

Enough of the darn bad.

Sunday after Church, I went round a friend's house, and we made a playlist for a friend, and we're gonna go round theirs, and tell them we love them and stuff :') We also had a fireside, and there was a competition, and even though my team lost, it was so much fun!! And have been texting a guy for like the last two days, and he's nice. Shame he's 4 years younger than me.

The school is offering a year 13 trip to Auschwitz. I've applied, but I bet I won't get it. They only take students they like, and I've had too many altercations with a teacher. Plus I need to ask one to be a reference. Eeek.

All in all....A mixed beginning to the week, let's hope things get better. As always, God Bless.