My best friend is so lucky. He's off on a mission in the Church. He's been gone about a month, and I still have the urge to call or text him every day. I've been writing to him, and everything, but it just isn't the same. I mean, I can't WRITE a letter to him to say "Let's go watch Mr Popper's Penguins, I'm bored. I'll pay" Doesn't work like that. And I can't exactly write to him and enthuse about how brilliant a film is, he'll not appreciate that.
I'm probably writing to him too frequently at the moment (once a week whilst he's at the MTC), but it's the only way I can communicate with him, and it's a way of keeping the connection, the friendship alive while he's gone.
But I'm scared. I'm scared he'll not write back (he hasn't so far, but I know he's busy. But a LOAD of people have heard from him). I'm scared he'll just forget me. He told me in May that he'd write to me every week. Nay, every DAY! And then like the day before he left, he messaged me saying "Actually, I'm not sure how frequently I'll be able to write you. It won't be that often, maybe once a quarter." Once a quarter. ONCE every 3 months?!?! Well, I feel like an old toy, just left in the corner. I seriously am not kidding, my heart starts pounding every time the mailman comes, and I can't pick up the post fast enough. And the disappointment - Well, I'm getting used to that now. Not ideal.
Him being so far away (he's at Provo at the moment, then in September, he's off to Berlin, Germany) is quite difficult. What can you do when the person who's the reason you're crying is also the only person who can stop the tears? I cried because I miss him, I miss his hugs, his smile, and his eyes. And I could never cry round him. Or be angry, or anything. I was just always happy. And if tears ever did threaten, all he had to do was talk to me, hug me, or anything like that and I'd immediately calm down. So, yeah, what do I do? I have so many memories of him, of us around my room, always reminding me of him, but I think it would very literally kill me to forget.
I'm eagerly looking forward to his return, because, well...Pretty self-explanatory, that one. But at the same time, I'm terrified. We'll both be different. Not just older, but more mature, and different personalities. What if we don't get along? What if my best friend is the guy that left, and I don't like the guy that comes back? Or he doesn't like me? Meep.
Er. In other news. Off to my Dad's tomorrow for a few days. Finished college, results are due soon. NOT looking forward to those. I'm also looking for a new job, and I'm in a predicament with a few friends from my old Church. See, they basically are giving me LOADS of Anti-LDS literature, which stings, and they hardly know anything about my Church. So I'm trying to educate them, but I reckon it's like telling someone the sky is pink. They won't budge on their opinion, which is a shame, because if they just opened their eyes a little, they'll see that the LDS are some of the nicest people in the World. And yeah, like every society, every culture, there are a few that give the majority a bad name. Because of some guy in the States very recently, my mother is convinced we practice polygamy. Started talking about it over dinner today. I very nearly choked on my stir-fry. But my mother and her partner are slowly becoming more open-minded to the Church, which is again, a shock. And I think I'm just gonna leave that annoying, and quite frankly DULL website known as Facebook... Nothing good happens on there anyway.
Until next time! <3
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